The world of social media can be a place of both community and seclusion. There is a sense of being right there with people. Of being able to connect with someone in a split second. Then there is the flip side where it can also make you feel very excluded from the world and social interactions.
Feeling alone is something that is a regular emotion for me. I could be surrounded by people and yet I feel as though I have no one to turn to. There can be all these people who I follow on social media that I may call ‘friends’ but the reality is it’s just one person looking in on everyone else’s fun times they choose to post. There is the sense of feeling connected and yet deep down I really don’t feel it and how many would actually stop to say hello if I saw them in the street.
I have people I talk to, people I can laugh with and who I enjoy spending time with. But it often feels like they go away to other friends or other aspects of their lives and I was just this really small part that didn’t mean much. Yet I appreciate them greatly. I know this feeling is partly due to the fact that I do get anxiety and over think a lot of things in regards to people and friends but the feeling is still there. The feeling that when the world goes quiet and my mind is loud that I don’t really have many people I feel I can always turn to.
I often feel like I’m bothering people. That they have their own things going on and I don’t want to pile my troubles on to them. It becomes easier to just keep it to myself instead of worrying about what they may think or how they’ll react.
These people I still want to help and support. They are people I care about very much and I constantly want to be around. I hope that one day my mind will allow me to receive the same back. To feel like I am worth enough to receive the same back and that I am not in fact bothering people. And that outside of all the social media ‘show’ that there will be a feeling of support and togetherness. Actually realising that I do in fact have people around.
Do you ever get feelings of loneliness or as though you’re bothering people? How do you overcome it?